Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Dear Santa,

It's that time of year again. Time to determine if Koen has been Naughty or Nice. For your reference and consideration, Koen turned 34 months old last Wednesday and he has been sick for the last 2 weeks.

If you've been reading my letters from this year, you know how much Koen's interests have changed and you also know how much he has grown into a little boy faster than Guin and I wanted. His energy level seems to constantly increase week by week and he is almost on the the brink of perpetual motion. The video below is a very small sample of how much energy he has trapped inside his 30 lbs. frame.

The Gift(s)
So lets get down to it. Koen asked for a "Fisher Price Lightning McQueen Power Wheels 12V Battery Operated car."
No, I'm not kidding. He wants to upgrade the Fred Flintstone Foot-Powered Vehicle (that once belonged to Kera which he adopted as his own). Can't you just give him "an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle
(BB Gun) with a compass in the stock, and this thing which tells time?" I promise he won't shoot his eye out.

If you feel his behavior meets your yearly expectations of being good, where will he drive it? Our backyard isn't a practical solution since Guin and I decided against re-landscaping until next year because of our lovely Demon Spawn Dog, Sadie. Ooops. I mean because of our innocent and well behaved puppy, Sadie. And I really don't trust those
feeble-minded idiots who think our street is a drag strip. Having Koen drive in the front of our house is absolutely
out of the question.

So that eliminates our house. I guess that leaves either Grandma and Grandpa or Lola and Lolo's house. If that's the case, you do realize he will always want to leave home and go play with it. Hmm...that's not a bad plan after all. Is this your gift to us? Hahahaha...

I know another gift that might keep his interest at home. A couple of weeks ago, Koen was talking to his Great Grandma on the phone and told her he wanted Santa to bring him a Big Boy Bed with a Ladder from Ikea. They have a bed that he has been eye-balling for some time. The bed is reversible and has two options. Option 1) the bed is on top with the underside open for a desk or some sort of cave dwelling. Option 2) the bed is normal with the ladder and legs giving the ability to drape a canopy over the top.

I have to be honest. I don't really like the idea of this bed for two reason, 1) My fear that Koen might jump off and break his neck and 2) It is just plain UGLY. It looks like it is put together with toothpicks. I love the idea that it is reversible, but seriously, couldn't the designers make it a little more attractive?

That's for Babies!
Koen has decided he no longer likes Thomas and Friends because he is a "big boy" and "that is for babies." Guin and I couldn't believe what we were hearing. Guin's translation was, "Mom, I'm growing up and I am no longer your little baby." My translation, "Dad, thanks for spending lots of money on those toys, but I've out grown them and will be asking you to spend more money on toys that I will also out grow. Then I'll start asking for money to go out with my friends or even dates. Thanks." He hasn't completely abandoned trains, just Thomas and Friends. He reassured us that he still likes "big, big, big, big, big trains."

Yet, Another Obsession
So Guin and I are dealing with another obsession. Transformers. You got it. Those lovely robots from the early 1990's that "transform" into Cars, Jets, Animals, etc. I want to be clear on this; I am not to blame. I didn't grow up watching the cartoon. I was too old at that point. This is more the generation for my brother Greg and Guin's brother Joe.

Those in question are Lola and Lolo. Just so we're clear. I'm not placing blame. I'm merely stating who got him started. Hahaha....they let him play with Greg's old toys and that's how the obsession began. However, I am responsible for letting him watch the introduction of the original animated series on YouTube. Damn that YouTube....hahaha.
Wait! I guess I am to blame. Lola and Lolo only introduced it to him, I fed the fire. Crap!

Let's get off the subject of me corrupting my child....did I mention that Koen was sick for the last 2 weeks? Here are a few pictures of him in his "Speed Racer poses":

Speed Racer

Racer X

Snake Oiler

Imagination
Koen's imagination has really taken off last month. He is at that stage of pretend and making up stories while he plays. For instance; while we were decorating the house for Christmas, he was pretending he was a wreath and wanted us to put him in our wreath box and walk him around the house. Is that weird or normal? hahahahaha...

It's Back
I have to mention that Koen is repeating his Universal Greeting. Similar to what he was doing this same time last year. He is blowing and making elephant sounds when we ask him to say "Hi" or "Thank You" to someone. Guin and I still don't know where he got this from, or why he started doing it again.

To be fair, Koen has really been a Good Boy this year. He has his moments of unclarity and acts like we don't exist, but what kid doesn't behave this way. He has and will continue to have his little "fits" when he doesn't get his way, but that is to be expected. He will also start questioning our authority, but what kid hasn't done that with their parents. And he will continue to explore and test his boundaries of physical and mental strength. I think our "little boy" is on the right path.

I hope you will consider Koen as "NICE" this year, as you go through your list of boys and girls and the presents they get. If it will help his case, he loves to clean? We have a "Clean Up" song he sings. We found this helps him enjoy picking up after himself. That's my boy...a chip off the old block. When things are out of order, he's just like his old man; anal.

Best Regards,
Koen's Daddy

ps. Do you think I can get an Athletic Cup this year? I know it's a strange request. Guin and I would love to have more kids, but with Koen's inability to control his arms and legs when he is within a 1 foot proximity of me really does hurt.